Better Than Blurbs: Lost in Transplantation by Eldonna Edwards

Because I no longer write blurbs, but still very much want to help other authors, I've launched a blog series called Better Than Blurbs. The authors and I will have in-depth discussions about their books, which I hope will help readers identify whether they'd enjoy reading them. This is the eighth post of the series. The author is Eldonna Edwards, and the book is Lost in Transplantation: Memoir of an Unconventional Organ Donor.

Me: Eldonna, please Tell us about the book in your own words:

Eldonna: Lost in Transplantation isn't just a chronicle of a living donor, it's a book about life and the decisions we make when given difficult choices. The memoir is interwoven with stories about growing up as a Bible-thumping preacher's kid, my work as a massage therapist, raising children—mostly as a single mother—and the seesaw transitions of menopause. There’s a good deal of humor in the book to balance the serious topic. My goal is for others to relate to me as a real person rather than putting me on a pedestal for giving a kidney to a stranger, thereby dismissing me as an anomaly. I believe we are all capable of being someone's hero and you don't have to undergo surgery to achieve that end.

The memoir describes my journey as an organ donor but it also tells Kathy's (my intended recipient) story and hopefully the reader's as well. We all struggle, we all have dreams and hardships, but it's our attitude that alters one’s perception of those challenges.  Lost in Transplantation seeks to connect with that place in each of us that wants to make a difference. My hope is to inspire others to take steps—no matter how small—toward balancing the inequality and unconscionable inhumanity that persists in the world. You never know exactly how far the results of your actions reach— and the life it alters the most just might be your own.

Me: I want to ask a set of questions that will establish my focus on organ donation in the past. So I’ll ask you (and I suppose ask my readers at the same time): Have you read Second Hand Heart, which is about organ donation, but not living donation?

Did you know that one of the UK editions included a real-life living kidney donor story that I also wrote about on my blog? And for those who have no access to that UK edition, I also wrote it up for Positive Impact Magazine. (But I can't seem to establish a direct link, so readers can use the link to their home page and search for Betty Ann and erin or organ donation). 

I’m also wondering if you’ve heard about Garet Hill and the National Kidney Registry. They form donation chains that start with an altruistic donor like yourself, and just keep going. (He was kind enough to be in contact with me, because the Pay It Forward connection is easy to see). They even made it into the New York Times.

Yes, I realize this is a long question. I also realize that no two living donors are alike. So can you tell us how you feel when you read these stories? How much are they like you, and in what ways are they different? How much change do you think we might see in the world if this kind of giving gets a foothold?

Eldonna: I have read Second Hand Heart. What interests me most is the cellular memory aspect of the story. I’ve communicated with many transplant recipients who voice a strong desire to reach out to the families of cadaveric donors. I think that in addition to gratitude, recipients feel a connection beyond what can be explained or expressed. My recipient claims to have lost an appetite for a few things that I don’t care for, like lamb and ice cream. I’m still waiting for my former kidney to switch the recipient’s political parties. ;-)

In answer to the second part of your question, my surgery was the very first at CPMC (California Pacific Medical Center) to occur as a result of a National Kidney Registry match! I was the initial domino in a series of surgeries beginning December 16, 2010. Fortunately transplant chains have since become the norm. I recently had the pleasure of meeting Dr. Alvin Roth, who won the 2012 Nobel Prize in Economic Sciences. The algorithm he co-developed increased NKR matches by up to 167% over the previous method.

Me: Of course the best way readers can get this question answered is to read your book. But it’s on everyone’s mind. So please give us a sneak peek at the answer to the big question: Why?

I get this a lot. Here’s how I explain it in the book:

Wealth might make you comfortable but it can’t save you from eventual death. Education might keep you from poverty but it can’t prevent disease. Geography might help protect your civil rights but it can’t protect you from unpredictable tragedy. Where we’re born and most of the opportunities we’re born into all come down to chance. Some disease is generated by bad habits like smoking or diet, some is environmental like chemical exposure or lack of available prenatal care, and some is just wonky DNA.

Perhaps one day science will figure out how to prevent or cure a lot of the diseases that are inherent in our society. I recently heard NASA has invented a 3-D printer that can print “food” for astronauts so it doesn’t take up valuable space. Maybe printing a human kidney isn’t that far off. But for now, beyond one’s belief in a higher power, all we have to sustain our hope is the grace of our fellow human beings to help us through our struggles.

A logical or left-brained person might look at the data, decide the evidence is overwhelming against self-sacrifice to aid others, and leave it to politics or science to determine another's fate. And here is where I invite Captain Obvious into the conversation to state that I am not left-brained. In fact I am so right brained that I sometimes wonder why my head doesn’t rest on my right shoulder. I’m a touchy-feely, tree-hugging, artsy-fartsy human being who truly believes we are all brothers and sisters in this world, and that by helping one person you help the collective. I believe each of our deeds, good or bad, creates a ripple. Birth might be about circumstance but life is about choices within the events that occur year to year, day to day, and most importantly, moment to moment.

The encounter with Lucy might or might not have been chance—I don’t know. Had I not moved to California with my son, had he not attended Cuesta College, had I not chosen one class over another, I never would have met her. What looks random in the immediate moment might seem like fate for those that believe in predestination. For me, it was merely an encounter with another human being who raised my consciousness about a particular form of suffering and I chose to act upon it.

No matter how hard I try to communicate the need for donors, people remain skeptical. No matter how deeply I underscore the extraordinary sense of purpose in helping another human being, I continually bump up against fear. What I’ve gradually come to understand is that it’s naïve to presume anyone’s motivations for donating or not, other than my own.

Me: I know you have a writing background that predates this book. Will you please tell my readers more about how you came to the written word and what else you have done?

Eldonna: I love language and have always taken great delight in the satisfaction of stringing together a tapestry of words that results in a good story or poem.  I used to facilitate journal-writing workshops and later turned the exercises into a couple of journaling workbooks. Loose Ends and Journaling from the Heart were published in 1999/2000 respectively.  I currently have other works-in-progress but I set the novels aside to work on this memoir. Living donation is a timely subject and I'm compelled to get it out there ahead of the fiction.

Me: I have no idea if anyone reading this is considering becoming a living donor. But I know it must be a big decision. And I know that, no matter how sure the donor may be, it’s often a hard subject to broach with family members. Any advice to someone considering this gigantic act of selfless giving?

The best thing a potential donor can do is to become informed. I regularly participate in several living donor and kidney patient forums where people like me offer support, encouragement and advice to potential donors. In terms of sharing plans with loved ones, you have to stay centered in your intention and not let well-meaning family members pull you off course. When challenged, I would usually say, “I hear your concerns and I appreciate you supporting me in my decision.

Me: Can you sum up for us how this act and this book changed your life? Yes, I do know it’s hard to compress it. But if you had to write a paragraph or two about it, what seems like the most important thing to say?

Eldonna: Having witnessed their pain and suffering up close, I am truly humbled by the strength and determination of all the people on dialysis who don’t know if they’ll get a kidney in time. The act itself didn’t change me so much as it reinforced my belief that when you help others it takes you out of yourself and your own struggles. But I definitely came away from the donation with a deeper sense of purpose and believing my life had more meaning. People talk about what an amazing gift I’ve given but I feel equally blessed by the experience.

As a donor, my goal was to inspire people. As a writer, I hoped to inspire readers in an entertaining way. Since writing the book I’ve been overwhelmed by enthusiastic support not only from the standpoint of living donation, but from readers who reported that they were moved to “be a better person” after reading Lost in Transplantation.  I can’t tell you how much it means knowing this story has had such a profound an effect on people. I’m unable to read the reviews without tearing up. It’s one thing to tell a story that touches people, but to be acknowledged for the art of the telling itself is icing on the proverbial cake.

Me: Please write your own question, and answer it.

Eldonna: You were the subject of a documentary titled “Perfect Strangers”. What was that experience like?  What’s next? (You meant two questions, right?)

While researching living donation I couldn’t find a single film on the topic so I contacted Jan Krawitz, the Director of the M.F.A. Documentary Filmmaking Program at Stanford. I told her someone needed to make a film about this so that the tragic need for donors would reach more people. We met in a coffee shop and talked for four hours. By the time the meeting ended she’d decided to make a film and I’d agreed to let her follow my journey. Her crew was amazing and I often forgot they were in the room. (Word of advice to anyone thinking of being in a film: Turn off your wireless mic before using the bathroom!)

Over the course of four years Jan and I became dear friends. I’ve attended several screenings of the film, which has played to enthusiastic audiences all across the country. I think she did a fantastic job of artfully capturing the experience of both donor and kidney patient. We’re hoping to show it locally again soon but I also host public and private screenings. The DVD will be available this summer. You can view the trailer at www.perfectstrangersmovie.com.

As a result of the film and the book, I’ve been invited to book clubs, film Q&A’s, and conferences to speak about my experience. I realize not everyone is a candidate for living donation (but hopefully some of you are!) so I tend to talk about altruism in the grander sense of how one can find happiness through kindness and compassion.

I love my work as an advocate for living donation, but I’m also making time to write. What’s next is a coming-of-age novel set in the sixties about a psychic little girl born into a fundamentalist Christian family who feels threatened by her paranormal gifts. The opening of This I Know recently won the Lillian Dean Award for fiction.  The novel is planned for publication in 2015.

Thank you so much, Catherine, for all that you do to promote kindness through your non-profit and to support other authors through this blog. In hopes of inspiring others to offer hope to desperate patients, I’m asking your readers to spread the word about Lost in Transplantation. You can find me on Facebook and on the web at my website, where I’ve just started a blog. I’m available to answer questions about how to donate as well as inquiries about speaking engagements.

The book is availableon Amazon as an eBook and in paperback, and at Barnes & Noble. It’s also available for Kobo and iTunes.

Better Than Blurbs: Long Live the Suicide King by Aaron Ritchey

Because I no longer write blurbs, but still very much want to help other authors, I've launched a blog series called Better Than Blurbs. The authors and I will have in-depth discussions about their books, which I hope will help readers identify whether they'd enjoy reading them. This is the seventh post of the series. The author is Aaron Ritchie, and the book is the brand new YA novel Long Live the Suicide King.

Me: Let's start in the usual way. Aaron, please tell us about the book in your own words.

Aaron: Long Live the Suicide King came out of my own experiences with addiction, depression, and suicidal ideation. 

Well, that’s not a very happy way to start, but I did get to use the word “ideation” which is cool.  Yes, it’s a contemporary YA novel with addiction, depression, and suicide in it, but it’s more of a young man’s search for meaning in this beautiful, broken world.  And the book is funny because the world is funny and good.  A bad world wouldn’t have donuts, and we have donuts.  I could say don’t read it for the deep, spiritual themes, read it for the donuts.

Uh oh, now I’m talking about spiritual themes, which leads people to think I’m talking about religion, which is going to alienate readers.  Dang.  What was the question again?  My own words.  My book in my own words.

Friendship, meaning, desire, kindness, selflessness, compassion, sorrow, death, divorce, mocha lattes, and race relations in America.  Oh, and Christianity, Buddhism, atheism, and Geddy Lee from the progressive rock band Rush.  These are a few of my favorite things.

Okay, now that I’ve confused everyone.  I’m ready to start the interview.

Me: You strike me as someone who could write just about any damn thing you please and do it well. What drew you to YA fiction? It’s okay to be honest if the answer is the health and fitness of that genre in an otherwise ailing industry. But if there’s something that draws you to YA, I’d like to hear about it. Will you always write YA, or is this just one of many directions you see yourself going?

Aaron:  Gosh.  Thanks, Catherine.  Gosh.

About genre.  Genre!  Why do you task me so?

Short answer is that I spent the first ten years of my writing working on  doorstop-sized multi-genre masterpieces no one could read.  Part sci-fi, part epic fantasy, part Russian novel, part lost Gnostic gospel.  I couldn’t pitch these books.  I didn’t know how to talk about them.  They were too epic!

And then I read Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.  And I said, hey, what about doing a book like that?  Then I sarted reading YA, and boom, I could write cross-genre novels, call them YA, and they would have  a shelf to sit on.   

But more than genre, having young adult readers is awesome and talking books with teens is fun, and there’s just so much excitement there.  My YA books have an edge, though.  They’re not happy angels or lovesick werewolves.  At the same time, they aren’t full of eviscerations and R-rated skinny dippings.

And I like that.  My parents can read my books, grandmothers can read my books, I’ve cornered the YA market for octogenarian nuns (I have two such fans), and I don’t have to be embarrassed by what’s inside.  

Will I always write YA?   I think so.  I like the characters, I like the conflict.  I like the coming of age themes.  Someday I’ll come of age.  I have faith.

Me: What do you say to Meghan Cox Gurdon? For those (fortunately, in my opinion) unfamiliar, she is the author of the Wall Street Journal article “Darkness too Visible,” criticizing YA fiction for not being cheerier.

Aaron: I wasn’t familiar with the article, but I’ve thought about all of those things while I was working on my books.

I think there is a line drawn between YA and adult books.  A definite line, and I would argue that line is more about rating than genre.

I approach that line, but I don’t cross it. My books are rated a solid PG-13.  In real life, all of my characters would walk around cursing with staggering grammatical displays of vile genius, but what’s the point of that?  To show I can cuss?

In some ways I agree with her.  If someone is throwing F-bombs and going into graphic details about sexual abuse, is that YA?  Yeah, I’m thinking the author crossed the line and it becomes an adult book with YA characters.  Most readers read up, so really, a lot of the YA readers are in middle grade.  Something I  keep in mind.

So rating is one thing, genre is another. 

Darkness, violence, despair, troubling sexuality, all fit perfectly fine in the YA genre. 

For example, I found adolescence horrific.  Suddenly, the fairy tales of my youth were stripped away and I was presented with reality, where people do cut themselves, people are sexually abused, and bad stuff happens. 

I couldn’t run back into the fairy tales.  Once you know the world is broken, you know. 

Instead, I read lots and lots of Stephen King because I had this passion to try and understand the gore, the horror show, the nightmares.  Which I think is why teens are drawn to darker themes in YA literature.

As a writer, I’m still trying to understand the suffering, sadness, and sorrow in the world.  And what’s a better way to do that than walking with someone who is in the middle of suffering, sorrow, sadness? [Me, note: I agree completely. You don't pretend there is no darkness. You light a path through it.]

Jackie Morse Kessler’s Riders of the Apocalypse series is brilliant.  In Hunger, an anorexic teenager becomes Famine.  Is it all prettiness and sparkling vampires?  Uh no.  Is it real, gritty, gruesome?  Yes.  Is there hope and salvation?  Yes.  Because a key component in many YA novels is change.

One last F-word on this subject.  In Long Live the Suicide King I use the F-word once.  I debated long and hard if I should keep it in.  Then  I talked with a fourteen-year-old hardcore homeschooled Christian kid about it, and he said, “Keep it real, man.  If you can’t curse God, who can you curse?”  So it stayed.  It fits.  And I use it once.

Me: You said a few things to me that suggested that the road to publication didn’t go the way you expected. Of course you realize that doesn’t make you stand out much among your fellow authors. It really just makes you… a writer. Please tell us as much as you are willing to tell about your writer’s journey. The brick walls, the eventual breaks. (Breaks in the wall, breaks in you—we’re wide open here.)

Aaron: Oh, Catherine, oh me, oh life.  I wanted to be rich, famous, lauded as a genius, given keys to cities, honorary degrees, lear jets.  Instead, I write words, unagented, ignored by the big huge publishing industry, and really without a lot of external praise and certainly not the adoration I want. 

Which is probably good in the long run.  I can totally see me Lindsay Lohanning into flames.

I’m like a guy who couldn’t find a prom date.  I went around and asked all these agents and editors to go to the prom with me, and they all said no.

I went to prom anyway.  I might be out on the dance floor by myself, but I’m publishing books I adore, and I’m dancing.

And I’m not alone.  I’m dancing with editors from small presses, I’m dancing with other writers, and I’m dancing with readers.

But make no mistake, I’m dancing.

Me: I love Inga Blute. And her dog. I think she makes a great counterpoint of light to play off JD’s darkness. And I think she’s a wonderful way for the reader to see the value of life, even if the protagonist currently can’t. Okay, that’s a comment. It’s not so much a question. But if you wanted to speak to her character for a bit—what she means to you, how it felt to write her, what part she played in the development of the story in your head—that would be a good thing.

Aaron:  Inga in a very real sense saved the book.  Thanks, Inga!  But guess what?  She wasn’t in the first drafts.  After getting feedback from beta readers and contest judges, I knew some people just didn’t like JD, my main character, my POV character!  So I knew I needed to add someone who would let the readers know that JD is a good guy.  He’s a hot, suicidal mess, but he’s still a good guy. 

That’s where Inga comes in.  JD takes care of her, worries over her, and in the end, is transformed because of some of the things she said. 

Inga wrote herself.  I would sit down, and she would tell me things, and I would write them down.  Not to spoil anything, but I had no idea that she had a long history of mental illness before I wrote her scenes. 

Yeah, I love Inga too.  And Schatzi, her very happy dog.

Me: I’m interested in your choice of an overtly Christian teen character, Marianne Hartley. Her religion is, of course, at predictable odds with your protagonist. But as the books goes on, she becomes more and more layered and human. Refreshingly so. There’s such an enormous rift this days between the religious and the secular. Talk to us, please, about your choice to bring her into the story.

Aaron:  Yes, there is an unfortunate rift between the religious and the secular.  Not to make a gross generalization, but too often the religious can be ignorant and the secular can be narrow-minded.  Gross generalization.  Ew. 

Both sides should remember that trying to understand God is like trying to pour an ocean into a thimble. 

While Inga has rebellious, heretical theology as far as God is concerned, Marianne Hartley seems like a goody-two shoes Christian girl who prays to Jesus at night, does her homework, and reads Sweet Valley High novels.  No dark YA for Marianne Hartley. 

JD think he has her all figured out.  Except one of the major themes in the book is the Grand Canyon gap between our perceptions and reality. 

Marianne is human.   Painfully so.  Between her and Inga, they give JD the answers he needs. I have lots about God in my book, which I know will push some readers away, but these are the books I was born to write.

I love being an atheist. I can’t accept any sort of god running the universe.  And I love being a Catholic, because how can there not be a God?

If God can’t be bigger than that paradox than he’s like some crappy Walmart god and shouldn’t exist.

I’ve known lots of girls like Marianne Hartley. Not in the biblical sense either. So that was some of my own history shining through.  And I’ve learned, as JD does, don’t compare your insides with other people’s outsides. 

Me: I won’t do spoilers, but when we find out more about what has this guy in such a dark place, it feels very textured and honest and real. There was another very successful book on teen suicide; I’ll let it be nameless. I never bought the suicidal reasoning in that one. I think that, unless we are suffering from overwhelming depression already, we don’t want to kill ourselves because we blame others, or because of our opinion of others, or because of what others do. I think the problem is with ourselves. How much did your personal experience inform these choices? Or is there a place early on in the writing process where imagination kicks in and Jimmy is just different, just himself? Or both?

Aaron: My book really is an autobiographical novel. 

And I had trouble with that other nameless suicide book as well.

If you haven’t been in front of a mirror, trying to slash your wrists, I think the average non-suicidal person likes the idea that people kill themselves because of some specific reason.  The Ordinary People reason for suicide.  I let my brother drown, so now I want to die.

It’s clean.  It’s tidy.  It makes sense.  I couldn’t write a suicide book like that.  That wasn’t my experience.  Like JD, I had all the outside stuff, but I needed meaning.  I needed answers.  My brain doesn’t work sometimes and I needed help to manage my thinking, which can be horribly negative. 

There’s an old joke about two kids on Christmas morning.  One wakes up to a roomful of toys, and one wakes up to a roomful of horse poop.  The first kid plays with some of the toys, gets bored, gets angsty, and wanders off.  That’s me.  Give me a roomful of toys, and I’m going to tell you in great detail, which toy is missing, why the toys aren’t right, and why life sucks.

The other kid?  He is playing around in the horse poop, running around, all happy.  Someone finally asks him, “Hey kid, what’s your damage?”

He replies, happily, “With all this manure around, there must be a pony in here somewhere.”

That’s who I want to be.

Me: What’s next? Do you have another novel “in the can?” If so, how much are you willing to tell us about it, and when do we get to find out for ourselves? In what ways is it like Long Live the Suicide King? In what ways is it unique? If you don’t have anything else finished, you can just imagine where you’ll go from here and answer anyway.

Aaron: Actually, I’m juggling four different projects, all so much fun.  I got a contemporary romance (very different), I got a YA sci-fi romance (Blade Runner meets Twilight), I have a YA steampunk family drama (very Firefly), and I have what I hope will be my next published book, Elizabeth’s Midnight.  I’m in talks with another small press, but I haven’t signed a contract yet.

Elizabeth’s Midnight is a contemporary YA with fantasy elements.  Oh, it’s so great.  It has France in it, and treasure hunting, and love, and doing the impossible.

It’s about an overweight, emotionally handicapped teen who finds herself on the run with her grandmother.  Both are being chased by the teen’s mother, who wants to stop them from travelling to France to see the grandmother’s lover from World War II.  You don’t know if the grandmother is crazy and lying, or if she is telling the truth about her lost love, since yeah, she claims he’s a sorcerer-prince from another world.

It really is a sweet book, solid PG, and Meghan Cox Gurdon would approve.

However, there is some darkness in the book.  Elizabeth starts out so shut-down, so out to lunch, and her mom is such a monumental dragon lady.   But those are the characters I like: real, hurt and hurting, dragging themselves through their days until that special something happens, that spark, which drives the wounded character forward until they find healing.

And we can be healed in this world.  Perhaps, that is exactly why we are here in the first place.  To find healing.  To find a home.

So we can dance and dance.

Life is sweet.

Me: (Everybody gets this one:) Please write your own question, and answer it.

Aaron: Your questions were so good!  I couldn’t add another one!  Perfect interview!

My bio:

Aaron Michael Ritchey's first novel, The Never Prayer, was published in March of 2012 to a fanfare of sparkling reviews including an almost win in the RMFW Gold contest. Since then he's been paid to write steampunk, cyberpunk, and sci-fi western short stories, two of which will appear in a new fiction magazine, FICTIONVALE. His next novel, Long Live the Suicide King, will give hope to the masses in April of 2014. As a former story addict and television connoisseur, he lives in Colorado with his wife and two ancient goddesses posing as his daughters. 

For more about him, his books, and how to overcome artistic angst, visit www.aaronmritchey.com. He's on Facebook as Aaron Michael Ritchey and he tweets - @aaronmritchey.

Better Than Blurbs: Teaching the Cat to Sit by Michelle Theall

Because I no longer write blurbs, but still very much want to help other authors, I've launched a blog series called Better Than Blurbs. The authors and I will have in-depth discussions about their books, which I hope will help readers identify whether they'd enjoy reading them. This is the sixth post of the series. The author is Michelle Theall and the book is Teaching the Cat to Sit, a memoir that fits in very well with my well-known position on LGBT issues and equality. (I'm for it. Equality.)

Me: Let's start in the usual way. Michelle, please tell us about the book in your own words.

Michelle: While the book covers a lot of ground, family, religion, parenting, bullying, sexual identity, gay adoption, social and cultural norms—at its heart, it’s a mother/daughter story. The importance of that first relationship that we have with our mothers tends to imprint (positively and negatively) on children like we’re goslings. It’s inescapable. But no one can live up to a parent’s expectations completely, which means we have to learn to navigate disappointment, loss, maybe even abandonment, in order to find our own way in the world. I was so desperate to hold onto my mother’s approval that I lied and acquiesced to get it. What’s funny is that as long as I was pretending to be someone else or compromising, I could never know she loved the “real” me—just some semblance of me. It was easier to be ostracized by the church, friends, the pope, and society than to risk losing my mom. You’d think it wouldn’t take over forty years, but maybe I’m a slow learner. In fits and starts of bravery, I had to let her truly see me in order to start living my life. Of course, then all hell broke loose. 

Me: I know you are probably already “out.” When you’re raising a child with another woman, you can’t very well be in. But with the release of this book, you’re out in a whole different way. Any qualms? I think it’s a great thing to do (as anybody who knows me will know), but I think it’s important that people understand how it feels to do it.

Michelle: I’m terrified. Anyone who reads the book will know straight away what a chicken I am. I’m afraid of being judged, wounded all over again because I stuck it out there. I’m afraid of the crazies who are out there hating gays. I’m afraid for the book to do well because if it does the story (and I) will embarrass my mom, feed that shame that’s still smoldering. On the flip side, I’m afraid no one will read it or care—that I just spent years of my life on something completely irrelevant. Did I mention I’m terrified?

Me: I love both the cover image and the title. Will you please tell my readers how the title fits in with the overall story? (I know, but they probably don’t yet.) Did you get any argument from the publisher for using that title rather than something more sensational? And the cover image… did the cover designer simply find it for you, or is there a story behind it? It certainly is a perfect fit, and very appealing.

Michelle: Teaching the Cat to Sit is a real thing and also a metaphor. I was a lonely kid growing up and about the only friend I had was our cat, a long-haired Siamese/Himalayan mix, named Mittens. But, I wanted a dog. So I forced her to learn to sit and shake. She did all those things because she loved me, but she was never going to be a dog, and I should have accepted her for the awesome cat she was. Same thing with my mom wanting a certain kind of child, and getting me instead. On another layer, I’m the cat and I need to learn to sit still and accept who I am, instead of running from it. For the title, I got lucky. My agent and editor loved it and didn’t want to change it. The cover designer just found that photo. My agent and editor also loved it, but I needed some convincing. I thought it looked a bit too sad and maudlin. My book has some humor in it that the cover doesn’t convey. But in the end, I think they got it right. I think seeing that first cover shot they sent me just made it real and scary.

Me: I bookmarked page 98 while I was reading. Because someone once said to me, well-meaningly I suppose, that for me to be hurt by what she was saying suggested I was giving her too much power over me. We’ve all heard the theory that no one can hurt you without your permission. But there’s a level at which that’s bullshit. And I said so. I said, “Imagine if I were to say to you, ‘Screw you. I don’t care about you.’ And then, when you looked hurt, said, ‘Well, if you choose to be offended by what I said…’” If nine out of ten people would be hurt by it, it’s probably hurtful, and if a good number of people find it offensive, it probably is. But there’s also a level at which there is truth to it. If someone is judging me, I can give up caring about their opinion. But it’s not absolute, and it can’t be done all at once, like throwing a switch. Okay, too late to make a long story short. Are you any more able, as a result of the way you’ve been judged, to, as they say, “consider the source” and feel less damaged?

Michelle: Nope. Rejection hurts, and no one is all bad or all good, which means it’s tough to dismiss anyone out of hand. I really don’t think people can control what they feel…that’s why they’re called feelings. It’s like a pain response if someone were to physically strike you. We can control what we do about those feelings, but not whether or not they come up for us. That said, my mom is the queen of saying things she doesn’t mean the minute she feels it, out of anger or an attempt to manipulate (probably both), but she does still love me. I can put up better boundaries or decide to sever the relationship altogether. Right now, we’re at the boundaries stage. I’d like to tell everyone with bad or mean things to say the same thing I tell my eight year old when he loses his verbal impulse control, “Please keep your words inside your mouth.”

Me: I’ve now received a hardcover copy with the most astonishing list of praise I think I’ve ever seen with my own eyes. Other than the fact that it’s a good book (in my opinion), how were you able to get so many people to weigh in? Or is this something your editor was able to accomplish? I ask the question because this blog is followed by a lot of writers, and I thought they’d be interested.

Michelle: It was a mixture of my asking and my editor and agent asking. I think the key is not to be shy and to simply ask. I wanted Jeanette Walls and Augusten Burroughs to blurb me, and sent a personal note with an advance copy to each of them. But they didn’t bite. I love their work, so I would have been over the moon to know that they had even read a paragraph of something I put on paper. But it didn’t happen, and that’s okay too. Piper Kerman (Orange is the New Black), Kelley Corrigan (Glitter and Glue) and Sara Corbett (A House in the Sky) were so generous with their praise for my book, and it was really humbling. I guess all new writers should know that almost every published writer was once in the same place you’re in, with their hat in their hands asking for blurbs for their books. Even J.K. Rowling or Stephen King. Everyone has to start somewhere.

Me: A quick note. I got the same kind of cold request from Augusten Burroughs, back before the release of Running With Scissors. I liked the book, but I figured most of my fan base, which was highly Pay-It-Forward-related at the time, would not. So I ultimately had to turn him down. Which further cements my feelings about the death of the blurb. (As with equality, I'm for it. The death, not the blurb.)

Now. I looked at your website to see if this was a debut. It seemed both that it is, and that your career in publishing is extensive. Will you tell my readers a little bit about your background?

Michelle: I’m currently the editor-in-chief of Alaska magazine, coming off a year with Backpacker [Me: I subscribe!] and Climbing magazines. I’ve been in publishing for 20 years, mostly with niche adventure sports and travel titles. I started Women’s Adventure magazine in 2003 for the 74 million women who participate in outdoor adventures and travel. I sold it in 2008 and continued to run it for the new owners through 2010. I stepped away to focus on writing Teaching the Cat to Sit. I actually wrote two “little” health and fitness books in 2007, but this is my first “real” book. Oh, and when the spirit moves me, I run writing and photography conferences www.facebook.com/creativeconf.   

Me: This is an unanswerable question. But, lucky you, I’m going to ask it anyway. What do we do about this mess? LGBT people want the same rights as everybody (myself included) and religious people want the religious freedom to reject those rights. And yet, as I’m fond of pointing out, freedom of religion also guarantees freedom from religion. Well, that’s easy for me to say, because I never tried to be accepted by a church. But back to the original question. How are we, as a society, ever going to box our way out of this paper bag? Are you confident about the future?

Michelle: You’re right that there is no answer, except maybe live and let live…agree to disagree. It’s weird to come back to what I tell my elementary school child, but here it is: You have the right to be angry, sad, indignant, or furious, but you don’t have the right to hurt me or others. We have the right to our feelings and beliefs, and we have many options if we don’t want others who are different from us to inhabit our space. If I don’t like the laws of this country, I can move to Canada. If the United States is too liberal, people can move to Uganda. I’m not asking to be married in the Catholic Church or for people who believe that being gay is wrong to change their minds. If you believe being gay is wrong and that it’s a choice, then don’t be gay. I can choose which tax-exempt church I belong to, one that accepts me and my family. But, I do pay my taxes and I am a US citizen, so because there is a separation of church and state, I expect to be afforded all the same rights as all US citizens. None of this is an answer. But I know for sure that hate and discrimination aren’t either.

I just read yesterday in the New York Times that conservatives have come out with a new study about how children raised by gay parents do in school and society. They are using this to fight against gay marriage in Michigan. The study seemed to focus less on gays and more on broken families of both kinds. I have to wonder what this means for the 400,000 kids languishing in foster care in the US, who have no parents or families at all. My partner and I are in the process of being recertified as foster parents seeking to adopt one or two more children for our family. Is being raised by us worse than having no family at all? Where’s the morality in that? And yes, I’m confident about the future. Progress is being made.

Me: Please ask your own question, and answer it.

Michelle: What happened to some of the people in your book? And, is your mother still speaking to you?

I’m working on my web site www.michelletheall.com in giving updates on all the people in the book who readers might wonder about: Father Kos, Holly, Ann, and others. You’ll have to stay tuned regarding my mom and her reaction to the book. She has told me that she won’t read it, and I’m relieved. But, I have to be realistic that the shit will hit the fan and it’s only a matter of time. I have learned that I have a choice in whether or not to have her in my life and expose my son to her bouts of rage and condemnation. But I will always hope it doesn’t come to that. I also don’t want her to completely abandon me—because as I say in the book—who is the child whose mother cannot love her? It’s complicated. It always is.

Better Than Blurbs: Loren Kleinman and Indie Authors Naked

Because I no longer write blurbs, but still very much want to help other authors, I've launched a blog series called Better Than Blurbs. The authors and I will have in-depth discussions about their books, which I hope will help readers identify whether they'd enjoy reading them. This is the fifth post of the series. The author is really the editor in this case, though she is an author as well, with a second book of poetry due out this year. She is Loren Kleinman, and the book is Indie Authors Naked. Which you just know will lead to a good discussion on the state of independent publishing.  

Me: Let's jump right in. Loren, please tell my readers a little about the book.

Loren: Indie Authors Naked explores and defines the world of independent publishing. 

Comprised of a series of essays and interviews by indie authors, booksellers and publishers, readers will get a look at the many aspects of the indie community, where publishing professionals of all types come together with the simple goal of creating something unique; something that speaks directly to the reader, no middleman necessary.

Some of our contributors include James Franco, Hugh Howey, McNally Jackson Books, Sarah Gerard, OHWOW Books, Raine Miller, David Vinjamuri, Toby Neal, Rachel Thompson, Eden Baylee, Christoph Paul, Jessica Redmerski, Dan Holloway, Orna Ross and more.

Me: The thing I like best about this book is that it explodes myths about the new direction of publishing. And these are myths I’ve been trying to explode for a long time. (I guess I’m saying the thing I like best about this book is that it backs me up.)

I particularly like that you include an interview with a representative of a bookstore that has an Espresso Book Machine. This explodes two important myths at once. First, that the indie/digital revolution is synonymous with the end of paper books. Second, that it will put little independent bookstore out of business. Will you tell my readers more about this book printing machine and what you imagine for the future of the little bookstore?

Loren: The best way to describe the Espresso Book Machine (EBM) is that it offers Print On Demand (POD) publishing. What’s amazing about EBM is that it allows readers to access books that might have been out of print as well as have immediate access to various book titles. An author can send a PDF version of the book to the EBM operator and the machine binds and trims a paperback.  The idea of the EBM was that it could also fit into a small store, which would allow smaller shops or libraries to be able to offer quick and accessible print runs.

I think McNally Jackson said it best in their interview with IndieReader: “Independent bookstores are committed to bringing a wide variety of new and exciting books to their customers. As the technology grows and becomes more economically feasible, I would imagine not only bookstores but also libraries and universities introducing self-publishing programs.”

To add to that, bookstores will become much more than bookstores, they’ll become a user/reader experience so to speak. While Amazon will offer readers opportunities to discover new books and authors, bookstores will offer a complete reader/writer experience: reading clubs and events, self-publishing options, and individualized attention to readers’ tastes. I don’t foresee independent bookstores fading any time soon. If you’re like me, while I love ordering a book on Amazon, there’s something primal about pulling a book from a wooden shelf and curling up in a corner of the store with a coffee and getting lost. Independent bookstores will have to look to other ways to make money rather than just selling books. McNally Jackson is an excellent example of offering a reader experience from in-store events, to their EBM, book recommendations and online bookstore featuring EBM books and various other services. They’re an example of the future of independent bookstores. They do it their way and I love watching them evolve.

I consider reading a very intimate experience. Don’t get me wrong, I love eBooks; I also love my stack of paperbacks on my nightstand. 

Me: There are a number of different ways traditional book contracts can hurt authors, but to my mind maybe none more extreme than the fact that ebooks have freed us from the concept of “out of print.” In general this is a great thing, but when working with traditional publishers it often results in rights that never revert to the author. Do you think this is a big factor in why so many authors are reluctant to give Trad a try? Do you hear much mention of this when talking to indie authors? It seems to me a bit of a hidden trap, and maybe most authors are concerned with broader topics such as rate and speed of payment and artistic control. But it’s one drawback an author can’t eventually reverse. I’d like to hear your thoughts on that.

Loren: OK. So there are two themes I notice when talking to indie authors about choosing to self publish:

1.     They want to have artistic control.

2.     They might want to get picked up by a large press (which does and/or might happen as a result of an author’s success).

And, to traditionally publish:

 1.     Distribution and marketing perks. Though, marketing is becoming more and more the author’s responsibility. 

I think the best way to go is hybrid. Traditionally publish and self publish. Why not? You experience the best of both worlds (pardon the cliché). But, seriously, as a hybrid author you can have creative control and you also get help with distribution. Some books you can choose to self publish, while others you might want to go the traditional route. Again, it’s the writer’s preference, but I think gaining perspective from both sides of the street make for a healthy authorial mix. Such a mix could allow authors to make more money, reach more readers, and allow for more cross promotion and networking.

Again, I always think it’s best never to pigeonhole yourself. Branch out. You have so much to gain from opening yourself up to various opportunities. The whole point, after all, is to write, is to create, is to share that creation. Otherwise, why do it? [Me: Note, as a decidedly hybrid author, I second that.]

Me: I’m wondering how much of a rift you see in the indie world between those who meticulously produce their books, such as hiring professional copyeditors, cover designers, and proofreaders, and those who feel that indie has finally freed them from the need to jump through those hoops. Do you have thoughts on this, and have you seen any public clashes on this subject break out?

Loren: I think finding a good editor is like dating. You have to find the right fit both emotionally and professionally. It’s so important to produce the best work you can. Now, everyone’s best varies. I’m a bit obsessed with producing the perfect book. But, really, is that possible?

I often see the misrepresentation or misunderstanding of the word “raw.” Raw does not equal a literary “mess.” Raw (to me) means the writing moves you to a feeling that is humane and basic. I don’t mean to say basic as simple, but basic in the way that it is from the earth, it is true to its own being, and that truth connects you to your truth.

There are too many books that lack copyediting, proper formatting, etc. It seems a rushed job. That is raw in the unfinished sense. Writing is a process. You can’t rush the process. If the book takes you three years then it takes you three years. If the book takes you three months then it takes you three months. If you rush the process readers will notice.

It took me seven years to write, edit and publish my second collection of poetry The Dark Cave Between My Ribs (Winter Goose Publishing). Indie Authors Naked took two years between the interviewing, editing, etc. My point is it’s called a process for a reason. If you rush it then you don’t trust it.

Essentially, my feeling is to always put out the best work you can. That should be a promise you make to yourself. It’s also the first rule of Write Club, or maybe that was to not talk about Write Club.

Me: I can’t help noticing that the schism between traditionally published authors and indie authors can be quite vitriolic at times. It’s easy to see how the sides line up: everybody is backing their own interests. That’s not necessarily bad, but only great fear could create such venom. Seems to me more choices can only be good. Do you have any theories on why we can’t all just get along?

Loren: Writers want readers. So naturally we’re battling for their attention. Though it sort of feels as if we’re raising our hands in a sea of raised hands.

I think I mentioned this in a previous question, but reading is an intimate experience. It’s up to the reader who they want to read. I respect that. It’s important to me that readers have the option of exploration.

This idea that indie is taking away from traditional publishing’s readers and vice versa is a bit self-indulgent. There are plenty of traditional books that I’d prefer not to read and the same goes for indie. But that’s my choice.

All I know is that the most professional writers have me hooked. The moment I see “bashing” I’m turned off. I think some writers kill their careers before they happen by becoming venomous.

Writers could get so much more from the publishing experience by cross-promoting such as connecting with readers you might not have gotten as a traditional or indie author. You never (never) know how things play out.  Sometimes by letting go of control we can experience a much more heightened, more enjoyable reader-author connection.

Me: Other than reading this book, which I think would be excellent advice, what advice would you give to an indie author just starting out—or to an author who is still weighing publishing paths?

Loren: Stop worrying about publishing. Think about your book first. Write the best one you can.

Writing a book is one of the hardest, most grueling things you can chose to do. And it is a choice.

Write the best book you can. When you’re done, do your research. Review your options. I spent months reviewing publishing houses. Not every publishing house will be interested in what your writing, specifically genre and topic. Take your time and interview editors and formatters and ask for references.

But besides all of that, focus on the craft. Focus on improving your writing. I mean I never met a writer that got worse.

I’ll leave it at this: “Your job as a writer is making sentences…most of the sentences you make will need to be killed. The rest will need to be fixed. This will be true for a long time” (Verlyn Klinkenborg).

Me: Is there anything else you’d like our readers to know about you?

Loren: My second poetry collection, The Dark Cave Between My Ribs, will be out in 2014 via Winter Goose Publishing. I started writing the poetry collection back in 2004 and finally hunkered down to re-write most of the collection this past year. The book is about love and loss, but also about letting go and being open to love, again. The book was primarily inspired by a traumatic experience I went through in 2003, I started writing the book as a way to heal. The process of writing resembles the process of grief in way. In as sense I went through the emotions, explored the sadness through writing, and through revision found a new voice, found new possibilities to live again. While I wrote the book as a way to heal, the book is not just about healing, love and loss are part of the human condition; they are real and raw experiences. Death is part of life, love is part of life, and loss is natural as well as the process of grief. I wanted to write a book that celebrated life, celebrated loss, and love.

I’m also writing a New Adult literary romance novel This Way To Forever. The novel explores how young people deal with love and ambition and the choices that come with each.  Other themes the novel explores are choosing romantic love over security, love as an ideology, and long distance love/dealing with long distance relationships. I’m still working on revisions, and hope to be done with a solid draft to submit for publication by February 2014.

Me: Thanks so much for taking the time to visit my blog, Loren! 

Better Than Blurbs: Elizabeth's Landing by Katy Pye

Because I no longer write blurbs, but still very much want to help other authors, I've launched a blog series called Better Than Blurbs. The authors and I have in-depth discussions about their books, which I hope will help readers identify whether they'd enjoy reading them. This is the fourth post of the series. The author is Katy Pye, and the book is Elizabeth’s Landing.

Me: Katy, please tell us, in your own words, as much as you care to about Elizabeth’s Landing.

Katy: Short answer:

“A classic girl-meets-turtle story, well told.” Christie Olsen Day, Gallery Bookshop

Long, “beware of asking the artist for meaning” answer:

I started Elizabeth’s Landing knowing zilch about writing a novel. I’m prone to map and think things out, but everything I read warned against setting up themes to define characters or tell the story. Just write. I did. And didn’t need to look back until you asked the question. It turned into a voyage of rediscovery.

Bits from Gary Snyder’s essays in The Practice of the Wild kept popping up as I rooted around for a way to talk here about “meaning” instead of plot. His insights inspired my early thinking, but thankfully disappeared during the long writing process. Re-reading the collection last week I found that rather than having forgotten, I had internalized these Snyder touchstones.

• nature (the wild “in us” and “out there” are not truly separate)
• home and family (the “hearth” we leave in order to learn, returning to sing as “elders”)
• community (the local, but also larger “cosmic family”)
• grace (living and acting out of our true place in the whole)

These frames both hold and expand the story. They drive the action, deepen the stakes, and cement character roles and reactions. Elizabeth instinctively gets it. She’s grown up in nature around Picketts Pond, been warmed by family and community fires. The move to Texas blows this world apart, forcing her to travel uncharted lands. Once loose, her need to restore but also widen her definition of place ignites every impulse. She has no choice but to challenge the story bullies—Grandpa, Pete, Larry Wilkes—and draw from strong allies—Grandma, Maria, Tom, even Becca. But this is no hero conquering evil scenario. Elizabeth engenders the widest opportunity for redemption—the antidote to loss.

All the main characters, including the environment, have been undone by design, circumstance, or accident. Through Snyder’s prism, the story asks what happens when we lose or abandon our individual and collective center? Do we reach out to connect or lash out to divide? Do we run, or stay put to battle things through? Some characters, like Grandma climb back from despair, others, like Elizabeth’s father and Grandpa deny and struggle to stay afloat, a few, like Larry Wilkes, drown. Elizabeth sings at the campfire, beckoning us home.

“Nature is not a place to visit, it is home…” -Gary Snyder, “The Etiquette of Freedom”

Me: Still glad I asked. I was surprised when I began reading the materials surrounding the book, for example the info on your Amazon author page. It never occurred to me that you researched for the book. I assumed you had a background in marine life, shrimping, the Gulf. (That’s a compliment.) If it’s not from your own experience, what made you choose these elements?

Katy: Thanks. The core story elements pull from my experience, especially the activism parts. But I figured a novel around gravel mining (see next question) lacked an audience, and pairing kids with animals is a natural portal to exploring environmental and social issues. Sea turtles are such engaging, iconic creatures and, like their ocean habitats, face life-threatening challenges. As an information junkie, research ranks second only to my chocolate addiction.

Me: I know you have a strong environmental background, but will you tell my readers a little bit about it?

Katy: Summers in the redwoods were an antidote to anxieties I felt as a kid. My relationship with nature was strictly personal and a refuge until my early 30s.

In the 1980s, that view shifted. A friend convinced me to join the fight to stop gravel mining on a neighborhood stream. Water levels in a critical aquifer were dropping. Stream bank erosion was peeling off expensive farmland. Suddenly, my “nature” wasn’t out there, taking care of itself; it was under attack in my backyard. Deeply entrenched factions killed productive discussion.

Our group hired a geographer, a respected mining consultant from the University of Ontario to discuss options, mainly to prove us right. Instead, he blew apart the narrow frameworks dominating all sides in the debate. He agreed, get mining out of the creek, but added, mining won’t stop. The off-channel floodplain held most of the remaining premium-quality gravel in northern California. Society runs on—demands—resources, he said, but consumers and the mining companies should pay the true price. Including all environmental and social costs. Instead of the two cents a ton county fee, a dollar would be more equitable. Mining companies should resurface roads damaged by their trucks, plus and devise reclamation plans that restored, even added value to the land and for wildlife.

Ten years of draining, yet inspiring work on the mining issue set my environmental passion. The geographer’s big-picture concepts “re-channeled” my future. I wanted to learn how to help people talk about environmental issues, to better articulate the problems and solutions. My next chapter included returning to U.C. Davis and graduating at 42 with a major in natural resources and communication.

Hired by the Yolo County Resource Conservation District, I completed my move from combatant to facilitator. For decades agricultural practices on individual farms and ranches degraded soil and water supplies throughout our model watershed. Our innovative grant proposals funded integrated fixes on demonstration farms and ranches. Farmers built sediment ponds, returning soil to the land instead of sending it downstream. Native plant hedgerows and grassed irrigation canals and roadsides gave new homes to wildlife and beneficial insects. They also reduced or eliminated erosion and pesticide use. In the hills, ranchers planted native grasses with many times the soil-holding capacity of annual weed species. Herd management systems controlled gully erosion. We won awards and the practices were copied within the state and beyond.

My environmental background began in meeting an emotional need, then moved to feeling powerless against the odds. The more involved I became, the bigger the issues and stakes, but the more I grew. I learned to be a team player. And when I had to tackle the narrative structure and the issues in Elizabeth’s Landing, I was ready.

Me: Your book touched on two issues close to my heart. One is the environment, and the way all of life is interconnected. And the foolishness of thinking we can do damage to the earth—drive a species to extinction, for example—and it won’t come back to bite us. The other is the way the political process works. And in my experience it’s definitely true at the local as well as national level. Money interests are served, the environment is sacrificed, individual constituents are kept in the dark as much as possible. It’s nice to see a fictional triumph, but in real life, do you think there’s a way out of this bind? Are you optimistic?

Katy: Ah, finally the novelist controls the world.

Sadly, your experience is widespread. Big money has nullified political judgment, gutting financial and environmental laws and crippling enforcement agencies. We know the nature of that beast, the real rub is (back to the gravel mining issue) we’re part of it. My life expectations of what I “deserve” stress the big E environment. They either contribute to the conflicts, ensure the status quo, or make things worse. Corporate and political greed and short-sightedness are rampant, but I think we hold many more cards to the future than we realize. It’s a complex responsibility, but we’re here to help each other. Business can’t stay in business without customers and I’m trying, in my own ways, to act on that power. I’m also starting to shift a key aspect of how I think about and interpret the “bad news.”

The media lavishes attention on the bad actors. That’s good because we need and should demand to know. Bad news without balance ramps up despair. Yet every day untold numbers of quiet, dedicated people worldwide walk the line, do the science, share tasks, spread the word, stand up for animals, plants, air and water, and support others in astounding ways. Some receive death threats, some are shouted down or ignored, others are hauled off to jail for peaceful protests. Their stories and example are powerful. The kids heroically working to bring about change completely blow me away. When I get down-spirited over what’s happening, I re-read their stories or write them into my blog (or into a novel). If we greatly intensify our focus on what’s working as we move forward, I believe the ranks for change will swell. Previously uninvolved, even uninformed people, will feel empowered to act.

Scientific evidence commanding change is expanding. The public is waking up, thanks to publicity on issues like climate change, Fukushima, ocean health, the BP (et al) catastrophe, plastic pollution, and now fracking disasters. Education is critical and the Internet is a powerful tool for mobilizing and unifying constituents. We’re not close to a package of solutions, but despite, perhaps because of industry and political blow-back, our collective voice is amplifying. Will our overloaded ship turn around in time? No one knows. The life we’ve known is changing. It’s in our nature to survive and more and more oars are hitting the water.

Me: I liked the fact that there was a lot more going on than just the turtles. Family backstory, a new friend with a disability, tough characters like the grandfather who became many-faceted as the tale went on. So, this was your first novel. How did you pull this off? Did you have intricate outlines? Keep your research in special ways? Or did you find you were able to do all of the layers of the story “by feel”? Or is this the first novel you’ve published, but you’ve written many?

Katy: This is my first work of fiction over fifteen pages. I wrote “by feel” until I hit the oatmeal of the middle chapters. An early critic kept saying, “where’s the conflict, where’s the tension?” Drove me nuts! I had to get off my ego and figure it out. Robert McKee’s book, Story, was an invaluable resource for that. Paraphrasing, “People say it all the time, ‘I like to write, love stories, vacation’s coming up, I think I’ll write a novel.’ No one would ever say, “I love music, I think I’ll write a symphony.” Oh, silly me. The writing shifted to studying how to write a novel, what makes good story-telling. That included reading lots of kids novels, mapping storylines, figuring out what I liked and didn’t in others’ books, and why. Re-write, rinse and repeat.

I worked in critique groups (invaluable) and yes, I used complicated charts. Everything was at the mercy of the sea turtles’ hatching schedule—all logged on a calendar and chapter action outline. A sea turtle vet helped verify wounds, illnesses, and procedures. I was fortunate to have technical support and a few story ideas from several of the world’s top turtle conservationists. A renowned Texas shrimper-turned-environmental and social activist corrected my fishing techniques. My second draft was almost finished when the oil spill hit in April 2010. It had to go in the story. I went to Texas that summer to ground truth parts of the story and see the first Kemp’s ridley hatchling release from Padre Island National Seashore, the most important nesting beach for the species in the U.S.  It was bitter-sweet.

I had wonderful teacher/editors along the way, all gifted writers who helped me push the story wider and deeper. “By feel” came back after I’d created the world, asked “what if,” and listened to “it gets worse,” over and over. I knew enough about my characters to finally leave them alone and hear their voices over mine. They polished it up.

Me: When you decided to tell this story, what made you choose a young adult protagonist/audience?

Katy: Kids, especially around Elizabeth’s age, are stretching out, looking for measures of who they are and want to be. It’s a challenging ride, the road between innocence and adulthood. Thirteen to sixteen remain my most difficult years.

The world is a much more complex and conflicted place than when I was a teen.

From the genres and stories young adults gravitate to, it seems many are at war with their futures. Perhaps we all are. I wanted a story that says it’s okay to reach out (what I couldn’t imagine at fourteen). Maybe some of the struggle will ease, and maybe not just for you. What you do follows you. Bit-by-bit you’ll find your way. Turns out, adults are connecting with the story, too.

Me: Since this is a debut, please tell us what you have planned for the future.

Katy: I have story ideas mulling about, but no concrete plans. As an indie author and publisher, I’m trying to get a grip on how to sail Elizabeth’s story out as far as possible. The most fun, and an invigorating break from writing, is connecting with readers and booksellers, getting feedback, support, and hearing others’ stories. A double chocolate hit.

Me: Please ask your own question, and answer it.

Katy: Have you said enough?

More than. Maybe needed more jokes.

Okay, no wait, a plea: For holidays, anniversaries, or anytime consider “adopting” a sea-turtle through one of the world’s fabulous turtle rescue and conservation organizations. Give, if you can, to your favorite wildlife fund or to groups supporting education and activism toward a healthier world.

And don’t celebrate with balloons or sky lanterns. Visit Balloonsblow.org to find out why. Main character, us. Story problem: environmental trash, dead animals, and a rare and disappearing noble gas.

A portion of Elizabeth’s Landing’s book sale profits supports sea turtle conservation.

Thank you, Catherine.

Me: Thank you. I want to mention to my readers that the paperback is 40% off at CreateSpace until December 15th. Use code: B9GBX97Y at checkout. E-books are also discounted at Kindle, Kobo, and Nook. That should make it extra tempting for you to give this one a try. And don't forget the turtles benefit from each sale.

You can learn more about Katy at her website and blog, follow her on Facebook, or check out her YouTube channel.

You can also learn more about the Yolo County fight to stop gravel mining and click this link about added value to the land and for wildlife.

Hope you'll give this one a try.

Better Than Blurbs: The Other Man: 21 Writers Speak Candidly About Sex, Love, Infidelity & Moving On

Because I no longer write blurbs, but still very much want to help other authors, I'm launching a blog series called Better Than Blurbs. The authors and I will have in-depth discussions about their books, which I hope will help readers identify whether they'd enjoy reading them. This is the third post of the series. The author is really the editor in this case, though he is very much an author. He is my friend Paul Alan Fahey, and the book is The Other Man: 21 Writers Speak Candidly About Sex, Love, Infidelity & Moving On. 

Let's jump right in. Paul, please tell my readers a little about the book.

Paul: The Other Man: 21 Writers Speak Candidly About Sex, Love, Infidelity, & Moving On is a collection of personal essays by and about gay men and their relationships. Several of our most acclaimed writers, many Lambda award winners and finalists, relate their experiences being the other man, suffering the other man or having their relationships tested by infidelity. The book represents a three-year labor of love and was designed as the “gay” companion to Victoria Zackheim’s wonderful anthology, The Other Woman. And to accentuate more positives, a portion of the profits will benefit the It Gets Better Project, a charity near and dear to all of our hearts.

One of our contributors designed a very intriguing one minute video that can be viewed HERE.

The essays in The Other Man are varied in tone, voice and writing style. These examples will give you an idea of how a few writers tackled the topic of infidelity:

Glen Retief, in his early thirties and living in Spain with the man he believed was “the love of his life,” experiences the ultimate betrayal when he confronts his lover’s deception head on in “The Rival With a Thousand Faces.” 

Mark Canavera, while working for a large international organization in Côte d’Ivoire (Ivory Coast), discovers that men, gay or straight in that culture, would never think of divulging an indiscretion to their partners. Telling would be viewed as an insult. In “Complicity,” we discover, as expected, that other man troubles are universal in scope. 

Perry Brass responds to an intriguing letter from a married—soon to be separated—fan in “A Pitiless Love” and finds himself sucked into an “emotional vacuum” that threatens his mental and physical health.  

Erik Orrantia is in a committed relationship when he falls out of love with his partner. Unable to make a clean break, Erik invites his new lover to move in with the unhappy couple. We learn from “Ballad Echoes” the importance of honesty, especially in matters of the heart, and that triangles are best left to the study of geometry.

David Pratt’s partner juggles two other men on the side while pursuing his dream of becoming a professional actor in the Big Apple. In “Way Off,” Mr. Pratt offers a personal tour of the Great White Way and points out the traps and pitfalls for those seeking fame and adulation on the Broadway stage. 

In “Husbands,” Austin Bunn looks back on his thirties in Louisville, Kentucky. Loneliness leads him to a succession of liaisons with married men: a chief researcher at a public health office, the boss of an automotive business, a lawyer, a pastor and a professor at a Christian college. Somehow, there is always an abundant and available supply.

Even with an excellent agent and with what many considered a well-written book proposal, The Other Man didn’t happen over night. It took a year-and-a-half to land a publisher and by the time the book contract was signed, I’d gone through nearly two different contributor lists—Many of my writers thought the book wasn’t happening and went on to other projects. As you can see, The Other Man finally happened, and it’s thanks to JM Snyder of JMS Books for believing in the book’s concept. You can read more about The Other Man on my website.

Me: I remember something you said as we were corresponding about the anthology. You said, “Pretty explicit here and there but I’m very proud of it.” I’m interested in the “but.” Of course, explicit content is neither right nor wrong, but the “but” suggests you might have a mild discomfort with it. Which I completely understand. When one of my books with sexual content goes out there (like the reissue of Funerals for Horses) I find myself thinking of the wide range of people who will read it and feeling uneasy about what some will think. Care to speak to this at all?

Paul: This is the first time I’ve attempted anything like this LGBT anthology. I write mainly short stories and nonfiction/memoir and have written relatively nothing about my life as a gay man until recently. Given my ten years apprenticeship editing a college literary journal, Mindprints—now sadly defunct—and online critiquing in a flash fiction workshop for many years, I had the confidence needed for the technical aspect of the book, but the content was another matter. 

In May 2012, I had the great good fortune to find a wonderful LGBT publisher, J M Snyder of JMS Books who liked my first novella The View from 16 Podwale Street and published it as an e book. Podwale Street was my first venture into LGBT lit, and I was completely surprised when the book won a 2012 Rainbow Award; both events encouraged me to attempt more semi-autobiographical novellas over the past year and gave me the confidence to be more honest in my writing. Most wonderful things in my life have come about mainly by chance and without any pre planning on my part: running off to Africa in my early twenties as a Peace Corps volunteer and staying nearly five years in Ethiopia; going on for advanced education degrees; and of course, meeting the wonderful anthologist, Victoria Zackheim, at the Central Coast Writer’s Conference who encouraged me to edit the “gay” companion to her very successful anthology, The Other Woman.

So getting back to the “but” in my statement, I think there’s still a part of that Irish Catholic kid from the 1950’s inside me who became adept at hiding who he really was. Some old habits are hard to shake. They hang around longer than they should even when you think you’ve overcome them. I guess at my advanced age, I still have some work to do in letting down my guard and being me.

Me: One thing that struck me as I was reading the book was the difference between how men approach sex, as opposed to women. I think this is somewhat masked in heterosexual relationships, because the man often wants to meet his female partner halfway. With two men, it can just be what it is. And yet I also see in the book that emotional level where—no matter how much you might view sex openly or casually—the mind has a heart of its own and tends to get involved. Any thoughts on this? Do you picture this book crossing over to a female readership?

Paul: I think there is just as much variance in gay relationships as there is in straight ones, especially when sex is concerned. To be honest when I was reading the essays for the first time, I was struck by how easily I could envision several of my straight friends relating the same kinds of episodes in their lives: casual hookups and one night stands; open marriages that both thought worked but often didn’t; being married to someone you viewed as “the love of your life” only to discover a partner’s infidelity or having been drawn themselves at one time or another to someone outside the relationship; and relationships that endured in spite of the ups and downs and those that faded. Several of my female friends have read The Other Man and have said they see parallels in straight relationships. Whether they’re talking about themselves or others I have no idea, but even reviewers have pointed this out. Lisa Horan of The Novel Approach wondered if  “monogamy was a natural human state, or if it a was a concept which sounds lovely in poetic theory but is not practical in the reality of interpersonal relationships?” I don’t think you can get more universal than that. So yes, I do believe the book does have crossover appeal to a female readership.  

Me: I once (co)edited an anthology, though it never found its way into print. But I know there’s a lot involved when you’re interfacing with so many different personalities. And a writer’s ego tends to thread through each work. Can you tell us about your editing experience? Any good stories? Ever feel like you were herding cats? 

Paul: I think I was incredibly lucky with the professional level of the writers I worked with on The Other Man project. Being an editor as well as a writer, I tried to be sensitive to the issues I faced when my work was edited for journals and anthologies. Did I spell the writer’s name correctly? Is the contributor bio up-to-date? Did I fiddle too much or intrude on the writer’s voice or style? Did I respect the writer’s wishes when he disagreed with my suggestion(s)? Along the way I discovered that, for me at least, my job as an editor was to make suggestions but not to push my opinions and just get out of the writer’s way. I hope I succeeded. JMS Books also has a staff of incredible editors—I’ve worked with several over the past year—and I felt that they as well respected the writer’s voice and writing style. 

So as far as stories go, I don’t think there are any memorable ones to share related to The Other Man; however, I had tons of problems with some of the writers who submitted their work to Mindprints—mainly issues relating to the professional side of submitting work for publication. In most cases these issues centered around submissions that could best be described as first drafts; thankfully, I was doubly blessed that this didn’t happen with The Other Man, and again this was due to the highly professional nature of the writers I worked with. 

Me: We are both of a certain age, and I know we both remember when LGBT…well, anything…was less openly discussed. (And, when it was, was called something far less P.C.) Can you reflect a little on how much has changed in your lifetime? Are there moments in history, such as the progress in marriage equality, that you didn’t think you’d live to see? 

Paul: I’d have to say that almost everything that’s happening now I never thought I’d live to see. As I mentioned earlier, growing up on the San Francisco Peninsula in my teens and early adulthood in the 1950’s, and before I left for Peace Corps, I lived a fairly closeted life. I’d had plenty of encounters and one that almost turned into a relationship but at that time, I was too immature and afraid to follow through on my feelings, especially given the climate of the times. When I returned from overseas in late 1972, and arrived home in the San Francisco area, I was amazed how much the social climate had changed. I’d missed Stonewall, most of the early stages of Gay Lib and hadn’t even heard of Mart Crowley’s amazing play and film, The Boys in the Band. It was like another kind of culture shock: one related to my “re-entry” to the states, and the other to the gay liberation that was going on all around me. 

I was very wild with the sexual freedom of the 1970’s—well, wild for me. I met my partner, Bob, in Santa Cruz and began a long and wonderful relationship with him in the mid-1970’s. Then AIDS struck and we lost nearly all of our friends. We both retreated from the gay scene. My mother was dealing with the last stages of ovarian cancer and I was emotionally a mess for most of the 1980’s. We moved back east in the early 1990’s and lived in a very small, isolated area in upstate New York where I taught college. Isolated, out of the mainstream and with very little contact with gay friends. Sound familiar? To be honest, looking back I can’t recall any gay friends during that time. The late 1990’s brought us back to California, for another teaching position. We’re still not very involved today in the gay social world around San Luis Obispo, other than for my LGBT novella writing and the writer friends I’ve met along The Other Man trail. I hope somehow this will change, but at the back of my mind, I wonder if it might be a bit too late. Age has a way of cementing you in your ways, so the jury is still out on that one. We’ll just have to see what develops.  

Me: I always close with this: Please write your own question, and answer it. 

Paul: I have a lot of important questions, mostly relating to our health, but none I would dare write about. (Catholic guilt strikes again as well as the pessimism I was brought up with: “Sing before breakfast, cry before dinner,” so I’ll leave those concerns alone.)

1. Right now I’m wondering if I’m doing all I can to promote The Other Man, especially since so many wonderful writers are involved as well as the It Gets Better Project? 

2. I’m also in the final lap of finishing the first draft of my WIP and wondering if I’ll ever finish it?  But that’s two questions.

The answer to both: I only hope I can. 

Me: Please visit Paul at his website at www.paulalanfahey.com.